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If you're the one snapping lots of pictures at an event or party, it's super easy to get in touch with people later. Especially early on in the game, open up about yourself when meeting new people.If you keep things surface value, a friendship isn't likely to grow out of it.On Tinder particularly, "The purpose was never just for dating, it was for social discovery in general," Rosette Pambakian, vice president of communications for the app, told me."The co-founders wanted to create a really efficient way to meet people around you who you probably would have never met before."The "show me men versus women" option the app provides is "exactly what it says," Pambakian explains.People would be chiller because the relationship stakes were lower. Still, I didn't want to play mind games with my future besties.So I filled out my profiles honestly, noting in each I was not looking to date, "only make friends :)." This practice got trickier on more information-intensive apps—I literally responded to Coffee Meets Bagel's "I like it when my date…" query with a "doesn't want to date me. But Laurie Davis, author of and an online dating consultant, later told me that strategy was all wrong: Being direct was the kiss of death.And he wasn't the only one who ghosted me after the big reveal.During the month that I used social dating apps to find new buddies, I sent countless unrequited salutations, offered up priceless New York City travel recommendations, and even gave my number to a guy who wanted to discuss first amendment rights. When I started, I believed that, with millions of people just searching for company online, I'd easily find my new bestie or at least someone down for a platonic hang.
It can be scary to go out on your own in a new city, but you're less intimidating when you're alone.
I was familiar with the apps beforehand: I used them for a month in summer 2013 when they were new and the It Thing among my friends, the source of all our war stories.
But I ended up hating them for dating because of their "all or nothing" protocol.
If team sports aren't your thing, think about joining a gym or yoga studio. And you'll automatically have things to talk about with the people in attendance.
If you go regularly, you're likely to see familiar faces. Vulnerability plays a huge part in emotional bonds with friends.